Friday, January 28, 2005 at 13:25:44 (EST)

The Government Flu
With the worst of my illness behind me, I am left to wonder, was it just a cold or a case of the flu? And was it caused by a massive government/airline conspiracy in which planes disguised as commercial aircraft release chemically active contrails for nefarious purposes?

Probably not.

So let's look to the future: Motico's Under-the-Table Record Release Show!. Next Thursday, Motico takes the stage at Sin-é. We go on at 9:30pm (and this time I'm almost positive this time is correct). Everybody who comes to this show and tells the door person he or she is there to see us will receive a copy of our new single! We haven't received the jacket yet but you will get some kind of one-of-a-kind product, including a CD-R of the songs on the record (for the turntably-challenged), plus some bonus Motico-related material unavailable anywhere else! Be the first on your block to have these amazing collector's items!

Think how special you'll feel knowing that everybody else will have to pay the exorbitant $3 price for this fantastic music collection! Think how attractive owning such a fine piece of work will make you to others!

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Wednesday, January 26, 2005 at 14:26:36 (EST)

Someday we'll be dignified and old
Spelling Bee tonight! I hope I can make it but I woke up after a fitful night of half-sleep to find I'm feeling seriously gross. A rhinovirus has descended upon my nasal passages and I feel like I look worse than that photo of me aged to perfection below. Speaking of which, does anybody else think the Older Me looks a little like Ben Gazzara? Unfortunately, I think I also look a little too much like Sam Donaldson.

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Tuesday, January 25, 2005 at 12:20:05 (EST)

How do I make you
I can't stop fooling with this Face Transformer Java Tool site. You upload a photo of a face and then alter it, either making it older or younger, a different race or sex. You can also see what you would look like if it had been painted by one of three Old Masters. Seems like most people probably just want to see what they'll look like elderly, but the artistic morphs are also pretty cool. The trick is to get a picture that conforms to the tool's template: head-on face shot, without too much in the background. Here's what Motico would look like if we had sat for El Greco:

Yikes, I look like Vincent Gallo. I had an advantage in that I was able to just take a picture of myself, the other guys were subject to whatever images I could dig up on my hard drive. But considering they were just snapshot photos I had lying around I think they came out well. Ultimately, however, I might just be more of a Botticelli man:

The weird thing about this one is that Buzz's image looks remarkably similar to the portrait he had done by one of those guys in Times Square.

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Tuesday, January 25, 2005 at 01:34:25 (EST)

Song from a future generation
Hi kids, I'm Jimmy Legs' older self ... FROM THE FUTURE! Ah, I always wanted to say that. But my mission here is too dire for frivolity. You whippersnappers need the sage advice that only the aged version of myself can offer.

Kids, what you sadly don't know is that this snow and generally lame weather will never end. Here it is, thirty years in the future, and that same damn snow is blocking my doorway. You'll have to learn to adapt to a very strange new world. The upside is that the mayor will make it legal for newsstands to sell vodka. Of course, it's not Bloomberg, who we strung up in the Lynching of Aught-Five, but I best not give away too much of that here, lest I risk messing up the space-time whoozits thing. I never did understand time travel. I can't even set the clock on my damn DVD player!

That's right, chillun, sell them Ugg boots and get yerself some cross-country skis. This here's Great-Uncle Buzz and I am sick and tired of you kids melting my Ultra-Daisies with yer ever-lovin' Laser Scooters. Oh, you young'uns don't know about that yet. Well, when they get them, you be sure and stay off my PermaLawn. Now ... where was I ... oh, yes. Every damn time I turn on the SupraTiVo, I keep getting nothing but old speeches of President Hilton's. I don't care if she did ratify the Cosmetic Surgery Amendment, I say she's still a tramp! Wait, what was I talking about? Who's that? I'm takin' a nap!

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Tuesday, January 25, 2005 at 00:52:36 (EST)

When the dog is on fire you go out for ice cream
More potential record covers! I don't even know if we're joking anymore, but what the hell ...

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Monday, January 24, 2005 at 13:46:40 (EST)

Can't happen here
Wow, the subways sure are messed up today! There was a fire at the Chambers Street station signal room, which may require reroutings of the A/C trains for some time to come. Not to be outdone, the F and G trains are way screwy as well:

Due to problems with icing on the rails at Smith - 9th Street, there are changes to F and G service:

F service is operating between 179th St in Queens and Jay Street in Brooklyn. There is s Shuttle train on the F between Church Ave and Stillwell Avenue. Alternate bus service is available between Church Ave and Jay Street.

G service is operating between Courthouse Square and Bedford - Nostrand Ave.

I see that Heather was spared form having to go into the office today, but I wonder how many other people are getting a Snow Day as well. Alas, there are no snow days for telecommuters.

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Monday, January 24, 2005 at 13:39:41 (EST)

There's a storm that's raging through my frozen heart tonight
Todd Patrick's new performance space is not by any means ready to go, but that didn't stop him from hosting a show there Friday. Things got off to a late start, the first band didn't go on until at least 11:45. The one toilet wasn't installed until after people started showing up (it was, for some reason, placed on a platform, lit by a halogen lamp, and surrounded by a large black plastic sheet). Many technical details made for a long evening with many lulls, and the sound system needs some work. But it was still a sight to behold, the christening of what will no doubt be a hotspot for live music in the area. But they need more bathrooms.

It was so unbelievably cold Friday night, there were times when death seemed preferable to setting foot outside. Yet Miller High Life seemed preferable to death. We miraculously got a car service home; otherwise we might have just moved into the space to avoid the deep-freeze.

It's art! It's functional!

Buzz thinks it's a lotta baloney and he's tired of it

Even Schmoo made it out to the show

The place was packed; and it's a big place

Motico believes they could rock that joint, but no one asked them to

Arturo looks down his nose at the Williamsburg hipster crowd

Prog-hardcore by Big Bear, the crowd loved 'em

At long last, Pats & Labor played a raucous, if disjointed set

The space still needs much work. It was revealed to me late in the evening that the 'stage' the bands played upon was really just a huge stack of drywall meant to be placed on the walls at some point. I'll be very interested to see how the space shapes up. Todd P is asking for more volunteers to work on the space, something I've been meaning to do myself. But maybe I'll wait until it warms up a little.

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Monday, January 17, 2005 at 14:05:41 (EST)

How I escaped my certain fate

As promised, The Bowery Ballroom is a really good space to see bands. The Mission of Burma show wasn't overly crowded and the sound was pretty much perfect. But there was one glaring problem. Two words: NO REENTRY. So we felt a little trapped in there. But at least the band kept us transfixed for the entirety of their extremely long set. They played two sets and then played an encore which could have qualified as a set in its own right. All this and the band was apparently fighting off a cold as well. I hope I can do that 25 years from now. I was especially pleased to see that Bob Weston (of Shellac) was present to handle the tape loops for which Mission of Burma is famous. He even joined the band during the encore. Man, that guy has a pretty cool life.

The audience was hilarious. The most energetic members were also probably the oldest people there. The best ones were this pair of Scandinavian dudes with long blond hair, one of the sporting a jacket with a crudely homemade Jam logo. Another guy was sporting the "I'm still cool" ponytail to distract the eye from his totally bald head. Why do guys think this look works? At any rate he was pogoing around like a high schooler (which he probably was the last time he saw Mission of Burma).

Damon and Naomi first came to fame as the other members of Galaxie 500. I have never heard their solo work, but assumed it would be the same sort of slow, smeary pop for which their previous band was famous. Turns out that was all Dean Wareham's doing; their set was, at best, reminiscent of Belle and Sebastian. This didn't sit well with some members of the audience, with some guy in the balcony shouting at them throughout the set. "You suck!" he shouted after every song, and later simply "STOP!" I bet Bob Weston was just itching to get up on the mic to put the heckler in his place, but Damon just whispered "We get this at every show."

It was good to see The Seconds, a band featuring one of the members of the Ex-Models. Buzz didn't care for them, but I found their erratic style kind of interesting overall. During their set a stinkbomb went off, leading some to speculate that the band had arranged it themselves. Short of having some kind of jazz fusion band play, they probably couldn't have come up with a more divergent set of bands for this bill.

Here are some random pictures, some of the show and some of us at the Alibi the night before. I seem to be experiencing a sort of Renaissance with that joint these days.

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Week of January 23-29, 2005

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